Monday, January 28, 2008

Argh. Big Argh. Daycare dilemma. **Updated**

So it's Monday. And Monday's in our house are "school" days for Ché. I've raved about his "school." We like it, and they are flexible in that he can go just one day a week. That's one of the main reasons why we chose his "school."

But today, Momma ain't happy.

I didn't drop Ché off this morning, Daddy did. We take turns so that it doesn't become work or a task/job for just one person. It's gotten considerably easier since he likes to go now, and doesn't cry the minute you step away from the little half door. Ché should be moving up the the 2's room soon, he's currently in the toddler room. This has been mentioned on several occasions, but never followed through with. We're fine with him staying in the toddler room. He's small, he gets along well with the teachers, and the other kids, and hey, change is rough. We like keeping things even and working well. Why worry, when things are great. Now of course, we also know that due to numbers, and everything else, it's only a matter of time that he will have to move because there are infants that need to move to the toddler room, and well, Ché is one of the oldest kids, so he's going to go up the the 2's first, so o.k., but it does need to be transitional, you can't just throw kids around from room to room.
So, whoever drops Ché off sends an e-mail to the other parent to update them, and keep them notified as to the mood. Today was fine, apparently Ché was a little upset because they had to go to a different room, since their room was being cleaned. I think he was more upset because, not only the unfamiliarity, but because there was a bigger kid in there pushing around one of his friends. Now, this friend is bigger, and would hold her own in the toddler room, but apparently in the 2's room was being pushed around and crying. I can see why this might be a bit frightening, because if the big kid in your class is getting pushed around, you gotta figure it's only a matter of time for you, the little kid.

So the reason for my anger?

1.) Why was a bigger 2 year old kid pushing around a toddler aged kid?
a.) Where were the teachers?
b.) I know what it's like to have a roomful of kids, last year I had 24 6 year olds to watch
out for, and you can't see everything, I KNOW THIS, but if there's a kid crying, you
damn well better fix that situation.
c.) Ché is small, he's going to be a target for big bully kids. I hate saying this, but how can you
tell your kid not to do anything when the supervision isn't helping them out? I will never
advocate for my child to fight back, but I will advocate for him to run and tell.

2.) When it was brought up today that Ché would be moving rooms this was the response:
a.) "he made it more complicated just with how rarely he comes in"

Now, I'm not sure who said this, but seriously, whoever did really needs to be talked to. How inappropriate. You never blame a kid for a facility/number/population problem. EVER. It makes me want to find a new daycare, no matter how hard that would be. ARGH. I am stymied as to why a teacher/administrator/aide would say this. Now, if it's one of the first two people that decided to say this, than it's a real problem. You just don't do it. I mean, if you did this in a 1st grade class with the "I'm sorry you're kid cannot move to 2nd grade, because he rarely comes in, and there isn't room, and we can't figure out the number of children for each room," that would just not work.
Everyone would be up in arms, there would be lawsuits, etc.
I guess it's just unnerving, because the facility allows for usage based on what you need, be that 1 day a week, or 5. We pay our bill on time, we pick our child up before he's there for 10-12 hours a day. We are complimentary to the staff, we make sure our child behaves, and yet, it is now our fault that things are screwed up?
ARGH. I don't even know what else to say. Any suggestions?

**I was apparently misinformed about the intent of the statement, however I still deem it inappropriate for anyone to say this to a parent. The comment was intended that she didn't want him to feel "pushed" out of his room, since he has just become comfortable there.
However, this doesn't change the pushing around and apparent lax supervision, as well as the need to set firm guidelines as far as rooms, ages, and number of children in a room, and a plan to transition. Ah, well, still open for suggestions though.**

1 comment:

AAWG said...

I say put him in the martial arts. It is the one activity we are "forcing" our kids to do while they're young. NO, not to encourage fighting back (retaliation begets retaliation), BUT to develop the self-confidence within them to not be afraid of other people and carry themselves in an upbeat and positive manner. Once they feel like they have physical mastery of their own body and can defend themselves IF they ever needed to, they won't have to feel shame or fear of bigger kids.

I agree, the teachers should have been more alert & tactful to boot! But I have to say that as I navigate this life full of "wacky" people - you have to take it upon yourself often. There is going to be that one bully, who is being raised by a bully, who comes from a long line of bullies (O'Doyle Rules!) in every class of every school. Just because Che is small doesn't mean he'll be picked on by them, but if he is fearful... jerks like that can smell it.

BTW - Congrats on the weight loss! & how are you feeling? Hormonal yet??